THE JEM DIGEST

In association with StudioBook

I’ve grown immensely as a leader throughout my life. I feel like I’ve always tried to put myself in leadership roles, whether it be on sports teams or in my career. That being said, I’ve mostly been a pretty shitty leader. When I was in high school, I led with passion, even anger. I was pretty toxic and while there were times when that kind of leadership was appreciated, specifically during the highs on a game, it wasn’t so much appreciated by teammates across a whole season. This kind of leadership is a “Boss” mentality. “I’m higher on the totem pole, so listen or else” is the kind of leadership that makes people numb to you. Makes them resent you.

After that, I found some success in head coaching. I was a players coach and generally well liked by players and other coaches on my staff. I still led with passion, but it was never directed at my players in a negative way. That being said, I went the complete other direction. I realized I was having a hard time holding players accountable and not because they didn't respect me, but because I myself didn't understand how to balance a friendly relationship with also making sure that people were doing what they were supposed to do.

As a professional and as an entrepreneur, I’ve worked on this piece a lot. I’ve now try to lead with vision, tempered passion, and empathy. I personally have found this most effective for me. I really try to listen and empower my team to be experts in their field and make mistakes along the way as needed to create a more well oiled machine. I think the biggest key to my positive leadership change has really been keeping my own ego in check and really being able to take feedback. Understanding it’s okay to have knee-jerk feelings and thoughts to negative feedback, but being able to work through those initial feelings internally to come to a place of understanding and acceptance. This way you can actually use feedback to get better, no matter how constructive or blunt that feedback is.

I don’t think by any means I am a finished product as a leader, but I don’t really know if that’s even the point. What I do know is that I am immensely more effective today than I’ve been as a leader and my goal is to always get better, little by little, every day.

After all, who really made anybody a leader anyways?